I am normally not a very expressive person; I find it hard to say ‘I love you’ to my family and friends. I am not making an excuse, but part of this is because of the way my family is. My parents and siblings are not too touchy-feely and display of emotion above a threshold makes them uncomfortable. Sis is probably the most expressive of the lot. Mom can be a bit melodramatic at times, though I would not count that as being emotional. Dad is confrontation averse, like me, and only on rare occasions have I seen him being sentimental. The worst of the lot is my brother. Every time I have tried to express any real emotion towards him, I have seen him become physically uncomfortable.
My friends and family have come to expect a certain unpredictable behavior from me. Sometimes I would talk to them every day of the week at other times I will be completely out of touch for months. This is just the kind of person I am. They accept me for who I am. I am more of an in the moment kind of person and out of sight can often mean out of mind for me. I pride myself on my independence and do not look to other people to solve my problems for me. Like all people, I have made some mistakes in my life. I regret none of them for I believe that my mistakes are what make my life rich and well lived. Even so, every once in a while I find myself in a situation when I have needed support from someone. At these times, the only people who have stood by be without judgement or question have been my family. I have not been the best daughter or sister and can be selfish at times but when push comes to shove, they always come through. My most ardent supporter has been my brother. As a child, he had once sworn to protect me from all the ill intent in the world, and for the past 25 years, he has made good on that promise.
Recently one such event transpired, where I was in need of protection. People with malicious intent were threatening my well being. I tried to solve this problem on my own. Even looked to some friends for help, but despite my best efforts the situation soon spiraled out of control. It was at this time that I called my brother for help. I think the biggest help he offers in such moments is a level head and his brand of pragmatism. The worst may not yet be behind me but the one thing I can be certain of is that he will be there for me when I really need him. It is moments like these that make me realize, that the actions of my family are more an expression of their love for me than anything they will ever say to me. I am lucky to have the unconditional love of four awesome people. My only hope is that someday I am able to make them feel the same way about my love for them. Until that time, I hope these words suffice. “I love you Mom, Dad, Sis and Bro.”
My friends and family have come to expect a certain unpredictable behavior from me. Sometimes I would talk to them every day of the week at other times I will be completely out of touch for months. This is just the kind of person I am. They accept me for who I am. I am more of an in the moment kind of person and out of sight can often mean out of mind for me. I pride myself on my independence and do not look to other people to solve my problems for me. Like all people, I have made some mistakes in my life. I regret none of them for I believe that my mistakes are what make my life rich and well lived. Even so, every once in a while I find myself in a situation when I have needed support from someone. At these times, the only people who have stood by be without judgement or question have been my family. I have not been the best daughter or sister and can be selfish at times but when push comes to shove, they always come through. My most ardent supporter has been my brother. As a child, he had once sworn to protect me from all the ill intent in the world, and for the past 25 years, he has made good on that promise.
Recently one such event transpired, where I was in need of protection. People with malicious intent were threatening my well being. I tried to solve this problem on my own. Even looked to some friends for help, but despite my best efforts the situation soon spiraled out of control. It was at this time that I called my brother for help. I think the biggest help he offers in such moments is a level head and his brand of pragmatism. The worst may not yet be behind me but the one thing I can be certain of is that he will be there for me when I really need him. It is moments like these that make me realize, that the actions of my family are more an expression of their love for me than anything they will ever say to me. I am lucky to have the unconditional love of four awesome people. My only hope is that someday I am able to make them feel the same way about my love for them. Until that time, I hope these words suffice. “I love you Mom, Dad, Sis and Bro.”
